SEXY SMS :

1) 7 Year OLD boy Being Trialed In court 4 rape. Layer holding boy’s Penis MY LORD,! Ye Baccha Kya Rape Kar sakta hai ,
Boy: “Ziyada math hila warna case haar Jayain gay !”

2) For a woman Every Man is Terrorist. First he attacks her Twin Towers & then He Destroys her Pentagon & then Thrusts a missile in Her Bunkers

3) Boy: Can I Touch ur Software.
Girl: First Show Me ur Hardware.
Boy: Should I Install it In ur System.
Girl: Cover it with anti virus &then Install.

4) Newton's 3 laws.
1.Every man has a pole, woman has a hole
2.When pole enters hole, it produces a new soul
3.When hand in motion, it produces lotion.

5) RED ALERT: Bird Flu has taken 10 lives So far in S.E. Asia .U R advised 2-change Ur underwear 2 times a day “TO PROTECT your COCK”

7) A man is dying of Cancer.
His son asked him, "Dad, why do u keep telling people u're dying of AIDS?"
Answer: "So when I'm dead no one will dare touch ur mom

What do u get when u have sex with a judge, banker & architect?Judge- Honourable discharge.
Banker- Premature withdrawal.
Architect- Illegal erection.
9) Nipple Nipple dont be far,
Can I Press u in my car.
Up above the chest so high,
Always milky never dry.
Let me suck u don't feel shy,
In the braziers u will die

10) What does a girl mean when she offers pepsi?
P= please
E=enter
P=penis
S=slowly
I=inside
"aha" yeh dil mange more.


11) Husband ask,"Do u know meaning of WIFE - Without Information Fighting Everytime!!!"Wife replies,"It means - With Idiot For Ever!!!

12) Girls have Stupid Specialty .they get WET w/out bath, They BLEED w/out injury .They give Milk w/out eating grass .They make boneless things HARD without ……….

13) Man walked into ladies toilet. Lady who was inside shouted 'THIS IS EXCLUSIVELY FOR WOMEN'. The man, unzipping his pants said, 'THIS TOO'!

14) Son to Dad-Daddy, does a heart have legs? Dad-of course not! Son-don't lie, I heard u saying "sweet heart..spread ur legs!"
15) A woman gave birth to 6 babies, on seeing this she got off the hospital bed and slapped her husband and shouted, "I told u not to do in doggy style."

16) 3 Sardar were stroking there cock very fast n hard in restaurant.
waitress: What the hell r u doin? Sardar:V r hungry & the menu says "FIRST CUM FIRST SERVE".

17) Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Ahmed : I want 2 b a pilot.
James : I want 2 b a doctor.
Deepa: I want 2 b a good mother.
Asif : I want 2 help Deepa .

1 Dear lady subscribers: due to a fault in magnetic field and signals of our service your handsets will vibrate for one hour So keep it in your pussy & enjoy! *Customer Care*

19) The 'F' rule:- Find her..., Friend her..., Flirt her..., Finger her..., **** her..., Forget her.

20) Doctor says: A penis is the greatest breakfast because it has a mushroom head, a hotdog, 2 eggs and cream which provides all the nutrients 2 make women healthy.

21) A priest saw a girl removing her blouse. The priest prayed: God, please close my eyes. When he opened his eyes, the girl was naked This time he prayed God please close your eyes.
22) An arab was being interviewed at a US checkpoint.you name pls. " abdul aziz "sex? " six times a week!! "no, no, I mean male or female! "doesn't matters, sometimes even camel!!! "

23) what makes a happy man? daughter on the cover of cosmo. son on the cover of sports illustrated mistress on the cover of playboy and .... wife on the cover of " missing persons "

24) teacher: what do you want to become?
li'l Johnny: doctor !!
teacher: why? lj:
bcoz its the only profession where u can tell a woman to take off her clothes and ask her husband to pay for it.

25) Woman complaining to dentist it ' s so painful; I ' d rather have a baby than have a tooth removed. Dentist make up your mind soon, I ' ll adjust the chair accordingly.

26) Old lady, 85, a virgin, about to die. Wanted her tombstone to read BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN. The engraver shortened it to " RETURNED UN OPENED "
27) 75 year old man got married to a 15 yr girl. On their first night both were crying. why??? bcoz she didn ' t know anything, and he had forgotten everything

2 AGE OF BOOBS: 14 to 16 LEMON, 17 to 22 ORANGE 23 to 28 MANGO, 29 to 40 TENDER COCONUT, 41 to 55 USED PILLOW, 56 to 65 AIR REMOVED BALLOON.


29) Mobile is the only thing that a man proudly says - Mine is smaller than yours!

30) A woman worries about The future until She get a husband .A man never worried about the future until he get a wife.

31) SMS Means:
S - Sexually
M - Motile
S - Stage
so keep messaging me when you at puberty.

32) Lovers send SMS when they are in a Sexually Motile Stage.
so keep messaging me when you are in toilet. my dear lover.

33)Newtans Law of LOVE,
Love neither can B created nor B destroyed,
It can only be changed from 1 girl friend 2 another…
Got it?

34) SEASON DHAMAKA
Send UR GIRL FRIEND …2 ME & GET A CHILD………FREE ………HURRY UP
FIRST 10 WINNERS WILL GET TWINS

35) A Child : Had Never Seen His “HIPs” .Once His Teacher Beat him on his Hips. He came back home N saw his hip, in mirror N said
“KAMEENAY NAY DO TUKRAY KAR DIYE”

36) Sachin Married with an Old women , Kumlay Married a widow
Why ? Becz a batesman Like an old Ball and a Bowler Likes a Used Ball

37) Last night in summer a girl foned in KESC & SAID, Me ALONE & LIGHT Is not here .Plz send a man..second 1 said .mam m alone here 2 plz use my candle.

3 Girls Goes to repair an umbrella. MECHANIC SAID: Uper ka kapra utarna paray ga Nechay say Danda dalna parey Ga . GIRL says : kuch Be karo Lekin pani Ander nahi jahey

39) Sex karo Daily Agar who mil jahay Akeli Agar na millay Akeli toh pakar lo uski Saheli……Agar na melli Saheli toh Zindabad Hatheli BUT sex karo daily……

40) A man & women were making Love .Man say Back Back, Left Left, Turn right back again now forward. Women says are U fucking me or parking me


41) Kuch Log Thori der Kartay hain Or Kuch Log Sari Sari Rath kartay hain Tab jaa kar hota hai unka Mobile charge…..

42) 1st Girl : Bos kay Table May Condom Pary Hai
2nd Girl : Ha May nay B dakay tay. May nay to unko Panchar kar dia.
3rd Girl : Gusay may Kamini mujay to bataya hota

43)Hows my Darling Honey Sweety/ My baby bunch cuties cuties? Come on give Me a Hug; Mumm……U smel gud ! Hw r u ? u missed me / come on eat ur Pedigree !

44) Govt Warning : Kising Females sex organ is dangerious 2 ur health Becz its 5% Urine , 3 % acidic,2 % fat & 90 %addictive ..He hehe Kiss MODERATELY

45) A boy Asked a girl whats between ur legs.She said : “LAKEER”.
Then girl asked the Boy whats is between ur legs.
He said: “LAKEER KA FAKEER”

46) When U see 2 balls B/w ur legs, It means that u r strong a gentle man. &if u C 4 balls between ur legs don’t get Surprise .It means someone is fucking U.

47) How does a cricket commentator describe a naked women? NO NO Cover No Extra Cover NO SLIP, 2 SILLY Points Two Fine Legs & a deep gully , Little grass on the Pitch

4 In the Beginning it is 7 times a day then 7 times a week then tri a week & then try a week

49) He : pora ander Gaya?
She : YES
He : dard Howa ?
She : Haan
He : ab Fit hai
She : Perfect
He : R U comfortable
She : Zabardast
He : array Madam ko Sandle pack kar K doo

50) Mom : Tujay Larka Pasand aaya ho to Baat agay chalagen
Girl : Larka to teek Hay But mota hai………
Mom : T.V Chahay 14" Ka ho Ya 29" Ka REMOTE 6" Ka he hota hai


51)Judge TO Sardar : why do U want a diverce?
Sardar: she doesn’t satisfied me in bed.
Sardar’s Wife “yar sari Colony Khush Hai eik tari he ahgg nahi Bujhte”



THEY R LIKE INTERNET VIRUS.... THEY ENTER UR LIFE ,,,, EDIT UR MIND DOWNLOAD THEIR PROBLEM DELETE UR SMILE HANG U 4EVER SO...NO VALENTINE


EID SPECIAL SMS
1.) Can I Stay here in your “INBOX”
&wait until 31/12/2006 .SO that
I Will B the 1st to Greet U & wish u a “happy eid mubarik”


2) Reciev This Gift of salam wrapped with Affection tied with care and sealed with DUA ,2 keep U safe &happy on this Special day of Eid.EID MUBARAK

3) Salam Shabha Bakhair & Eid Mubarrak 2 U & 2 all of Ur Friends & 2 all of urs well WISHERS &those who Love U &those that U love Him Happy EID DAY

4) With My 1 Heart 2 EYES 7 Liter Blood 206 Bones 4.5 Million Red Cells 60
Trillion DNA‘s All Breathing Of my Life All wishing 2 U.A very very Happy EID MUBARAK

5) Many Warms hellos Larger Then The Sea.
Wider then the Eyes Can See.
Sweeter then the Honey of Bee.
2 u & urs Family 4m me Have a lovely EID
send by EMAN (Egypt) to my cell on 2/11/2005

LOVE / + / Valentine's Day SMS
--------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------
1. I need you... I love you... I can't go anywhere without you... Oh my lovely... SHOES !

2.Love is not measured by hugging, kissing & sex, love is respect and trust, accepting

3.Everyone needs to be loved...especially when they do not deserve it.

4.Why do v close our eyes wen v pray
wen v cry,wen v kiss,wen v dream,
coz d most beautiful things in life r unseen & felt only by heart...

5.They learned me that one hours equals 60 minutes and that one minute equals 60 seconds, but they never told me that one second without you can last for ever!

6.If u touch &do not feel then its a desire, if u do not touch & u do not feel the its nothing but if u do not touch & feel its a $$ LOVE$$.

7.There are thousands of roses on this world, even if I gave you every rose to you, that would not be enough to tell you how much I love you!

8.What is a flower without the sun, what is the earth without the sky. What am I without you, that is why I tell you . I love you

9.Like a rose needs water, like a season needs change, like a poet needs a pen,but for ME , I need you!!

10.I love two things, a rose and you. A rose for a short while, but you the rest of my life

11. Tears in my eyes ......... Tears for you ...... Tears that realise how much I love you
12. For the world you are somebody, but for somebody, you are the world! Lots of love, Somebody

13.. Love is always bestowed as a gift -- freely, willingly, and without expectation.... We don't love to be loved; we love to love. (~ Leo Buscaglia)

14. Patience with others is Love, Patience with self is Hope, Patience with God is Faith. (Adel Bestavr)

15. GOD MADE MEN BEFORE WOMEN BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS MAKE A ROUGH SKETCH BEFORE CREATING THE ORIGINAL MASTER-PIECE,,,,, : o ) "

16. The truth is that there is only one terminal dignity-love. And the story of a love is not important-what is important is that one is capable of love. It is perhaps the only glimpse we are permitted of eternity. ( Helen Hayes)

17. If you love someone, put their name in a circle,
instead of a heart, because hearts can break,
but circles go on forever

18. Troubles are like as air, Luv as air, Luv as deep as ocean, friend as solid as diamonds, & success as bright as gold, These r Wishes 4 U, This day and Every Day..
:
19. Someone may b in ur mind, Someone may B in ur heart, someone may b in yr life. But I am ur someone when no on is with u.PROMISE...

20. You are like the sunshine so warm,****you are like sugar, so sweet...****you are like you...****and that's the reason why I love you!

21.Love is like war...****Easy to start...****Difficult to end...****Impossible to forget

22. Some People come into Our lives & quickly go.Some stay For a while & Leave Foot prints On our Hearts & we are Never ever The same.

23) Sumday ul forget me... My name, my voice, and who i am to you. But even if you forget me, just want u to know that i will never forget how much you mean to me.


24) i never regret d chance i gave myself 2 kwn you. Coz now u're a part of me dat i'l chersh til d end. im happy having knwn you, hope you fell d same way 2, (",)


25) ThRee seConDs t0 say i LoVe yoU...
3 hours to explain it...
aNd a LiFeTiMe 2 prove iT.


26) Wen u find luv...
Treasure it...
Take care of it...
B true 2 it...
Make gud use of it...
Bcoz luv comes unseen...
U can only c it...
wen it's gone.

27) When i say i love you, i mean i love you as you are i have no expectations, no selfish motives, no other desires than to let you know i
really love you.


2 Can i say i love you today? if not, can i ask you again tomorrow? And the day after that? Because I’ll be loving you every single day of my life.

29) I love you
till the day I die,
I love you
till I break down and cry.
I love you
and I’ll make you see
that none will ever love you
more than ME.

30) if u hesit8 whn i hold ur hand, ill let u go. if u run away whn i giv u a kiss, il let u go. But once u let me giv u a hug, just once... il never let you go.

31) knowing u has always been a mystery.
i cudnt evn undrstand how we evr bcame friends.
But watevrd rison may b im thankful
coz somehow u made me hapPy...

32) When people see me texting they think i'm addicted to this texting thing. They're wrong because they don't know is that it's YoU i'm addicted to.

33) Never waste an opportunity to say "i love you" to someone you really love cause it's not everyday you meet a person who has the magic to let you fall in love.


34) Love is like air. you'll never know it's there until you feel it and
you'll never know it's gone until you need it.

35) wn i tel u here i am, wn i tel u i cre, i do..wn i teL u iL nver Leave
u, i wont. iL b here. i wont Leave u, & iL nver get tired of bein here 4u.

36) To live this Life , i need heartbeat,,,
To have a heartbeat, i need a Heart,,,
To have a Heart, i need Happiness,,,
To have a Happiness, i need you..!!

37) y do we close our eyes wen we dream?..
dts bcoz d most btiful thngs n lyf s unseen..
so ask me...y cnt i see u ryt nw?

3 I love my eyes when you look into them, i love my name when you say it, I love my heart when u love it, and i love my life when you are a part of it.

39) Saying i luv u is important, but not enuf. Love is a verb, an action word. Sumtyms passive because it happens to us but also active because we choose to do it.

40) To love is to risk.. sOmEtiMes we get .wt we dont xpect.. bt dats juz how it is to love..we simply have to give..not knowing what to take...

u.